A bit of Butterflies and B&B

What is the best thing about being more creative? Hint: Don't write goals... at least at the moment. Don't misunderstand me, writing down goals are important, except when they are too big.  I've done it, where a goal can't be managed and I feel defeated.  I set myself up.  At least I can't blame something like the law of attraction- I did it myself. I looked at the recent writing goals I had.  They were written about a year and a bit ago,. The only problem is they were something like this: "I'll write 2,000 words today."  The last time I wrote 2,000 words a day was in college, about 30 years ago. I know I can't write 2,000 words in one day.   I set myself up to fail, and then I hate what I've done, and hate myself for writing that goal.  In the end, I hate the fact I considered how bad I was as a writer, and eventually as a person . MY goals- and MY habits broke me. I lost hope, and lost myself. I hated to be near the computer, and I hated to b...

What do the Law of Attraction and the compound effect have in common? I rather like the idea of what you do or don't do makes a difference in your life.  It's all about choices, and in this regard, the Law of Attraction is at its core about choices. As much as one wants to, no needs to feel that they have control, it's impossible to see something clearly if you do not understand choice. I choose to be a better person.  Great statement isn't it, or not? On can say it is the Law of Attraction and they aren't wrong. Let's break it down. You are stating that's it's you ("I" statement).  Next, it's your choice.  No one is holding anything against you if you don't and you have the final say.  To be, there is the rub- it's future tense, so you really aren't committing to anything. A better person I'm glad you have chosen to be a better person, but would you mind if I ask you what is a better person? It's ...

First, Forgive I've made mistakes.  I've done things which probably should be done.  I've ranted, I've raved, I've pushed too hard, or too little.  I've grown, I've fallen back, I've stopped, and started. I can't be human without making mistakes, and I can't be me without my hangups and challenges.  Or can I be more than the sum of my broken parts? Can I be the one who can take where I am right now and grow from there?  Is there a way I can change who I am, my past and my future? This is where I have my hangup, I understand in words at least that my past is my past and my future is not yet determined, but I am unable to remain in the present.  Because I am creative, or because I can't stay in the present moment, I have a choice.  In this stage of my life I've learned that my choices have always been there, but the element I was missing was forgiveness. For myself, from myself. Forgiveness is a powerful weapon.  You can tell s...

I'm not the best person when it comes to planning anything.  I tend to have a million ideas, and plans at the go at once. Focused?  No, not really.  I'm rather selfish when it comes to making plans and keeping them.  I mean really who loves to have a plan broken?  I'm sad to say, my method of planning doesn't work.  It's not that it's not focused, but rather that because all of them are focused, I can't stick to one. Planning is something you need to do... but I write down the plans, and then rewrite them.  I think of colour coded things, and of doing the plans, and of maybe tweaking the ones I have at the moment.  I write them down, I put up the dates, the plans, the hours of work. Then NOTHING. It's true, I do have plans, but it's not the way I need to plan them.  The trouble is that I get past the thinking part and get into the planning part.  The writing down, the work of putting it from an idea to an action.  The c...

When the day seems to get away from you, and you can't seem to get on the path you are trying to create, it's easy to say to "hell with it all."   The thing is, if someone says it, then they have simply given up trying to be more than what they are now.  That's a sad thing, because people talk about improving themselves, and how "great it is this day" life doesn't give a damn about your words, but rather it throws you a curve ball. Darren Hardy or John Maxwell or any other professional coaches might help, but if you're not really into it, or deep down fear change, no matter how much money you spend on them, it's not going to help. Growth comes from challenges, and some challenges just seem to be a lot bigger than what you want. I am told, that you only get some much because you are ready to deal with that much, but the reality is, that's not true. Think about rain for a moment, it's a good thing to have, after a hot day, hav...

What is the best thing about being a bit more creative? It helps me and it helps others.  Part of what makes a person want to be creative is that they want something that isn't in their heads all the time.  I can come up with hundreds of ideas, but if I want to focus on what works, and what doesn't I'll need to get something out. I'm saying do not write down goals.  At least not yet. Don't misunderstand me, writing down goals are very important, but the problem is that, for someone like myself, I'll have some fairly lofty and insane goals. The ones where I'm setting myself up for failure and not even thinking about what I can do to get there. Take my writing goals for instance, I'd love to sit back, enjoy some tea and write.  The only problem is that I tend to say "hey I'll write 2,000 words today."  Sure. Okay.  Yup.  So what sort of poor excuse am I going to give myself when I don't write 2,000 words TODAY? I know I can...

I wanted to be more creative.  I had a problem to overcome.  When I would "go out on a limb" I would do my fastest and least productive work.  I would then expect praise, and when this was not forthcoming, I began to play the blame game. Ah, that blame game.  The game can look like these: It's not my fault that I didn't bother to check my spelling it's the computer.  No one likes what I write anyways, so I won't write.  It's not my fault I don't have time to post each day.  It's the kids, it's the time away from the computer. To some people it's everything but me. Or, are you more like this? The blame list can look like this: it's all my fault, I should have been better.  I am so dumb.  I didn't do it right.  I am useless.  I should have seen that grammar mistake for what it was, a sign I'm not good enough.  I'm stupid. To others, it's them. Either way the blame game is a knife to the gut.  It simply means I...

I'll make it clear right now, when I say creative I'm going beyond the usual things of writing it down, or finding a craft to do, but rather looking at a stronger way of healing. Every person has something to heal from.  I know the only way to begin the process of healing is by beginning something- from a place where you understand you can heal.  I'm not saying this for growth but I'm saying it as a starting point. When I came to the conclusion that I wasn't where I wanted to be in my life, I needed to find something to hold on to. I want you to look at that statement for a moment.  "When I" it's not about making someone else happy or finding that right person, place or thing that you think will make you happy this is when the change begins.  For myself, because I internalized anger and was a person who felt forced to be more "bubbly" more "open" filled with this "joie de vivre," I would never want to be angry at ...